When Samah shared her story with us last month, we could hardly believe it. She had joined the psychosocial support (PSS) groups we started for men and women suffering from depression or anxiety due to the direct and indirect effects of the war. Sitting in the first PSS session, she opened up,
“I am now 30 years old and already have 7 kids. I never finished high school, as girls often don’t in my community. The reason I am here today in this group is because of what happened in my family about 8 years ago. My sister Heba (not her real name) had been acting strangely and then she started getting worse day by day. My father took Heba to the sheik to read Qur’anic verses over her and he said she was suffering from demonic possession. My father took her from sheik to sheik, as her case was getting worse. One female sheik asked for a lot of money and then said she locked the demon up in a ring so it wouldn’t hurt Heba anymore. My sister got a little better temporarily, so my father decided to quickly marry her off. But whenever the man my father chose for her would come near the house, she would start to act up again, hurt herself and eat her hair. So my father locked Heba in a room and said he would keep her there until the wedding. But after some time, Heba broke through the window (even though there were iron bars covering it) and ran away. People said she had run off with her lover and we had no idea where she was for over a month. But then one day someone called from a distant village and said that my sister was there. My father went and found her and brought her home. With bruises all over her body, my father assumed Heba had been raped and blamed her for bringing shame on our family. Right there in front of our house, in view of the neighbors and anyone around, my father took out his gun and shot my sister. He then went and buried her behind our house, showing no emotion or guilt. I still remember my sister laying there in her blood, my father standing there, emotionless. The scene replayed itself over and over in my mind for eight long years.”
Now it has been about seven weeks since Samah first opened up. She has been attending the PSS sessions every week since then. In the most recent session she said, “After I started attending the psychosocial support sessions, it made a real difference. The huge distress I was feeling began to lessen and I have stopped thinking about suicide. Whenever the suffocating feelings start, I practice the breathing exercises and calm down. In many ways, my thinking has even become positive. You would not believe that after seeing what my father did to his own daughter I could ever possibly hurt my own kids, but I now see how I have taken my anger out on them even. But after joining this group, I have started to treat my children more kindly. My kids and my husband said that I have changed, that I treat them better, and that I am calmer. Thanks so much for this program.”
Note: Samah is not her real name and she is not in this image